Feeld Desires List: Every Option Explained (2026)

Feeld's Desires feature is one of the things that sets it apart from mainstream dating apps. Instead of guessing what someone might be into, Desires let you signal exactly what you're looking for—and find people who want the same things.

But some Desires are self-explanatory, while others are... less clear. This guide breaks down every Desire option on Feeld so you know exactly what you're selecting and what you're signaling to potential matches.

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What Are Desires on Feeld?

Desires are tags that appear on your profile showing what you're interested in—sexually, romantically, or both. They serve multiple purposes:

For discovery: Feeld's algorithm uses Desires to help show your profile to compatible people.

For signaling: Other users can see your Desires and quickly understand what you might be looking for.

For filtering: Majestic subscribers can filter by specific Desires to find compatible matches faster.

Unlike Interests (which are about hobbies and personality), Desires focus on relationship dynamics and intimacy preferences.

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Complete Desires List and Definitions

Here's every Desire currently available on Feeld, organized by category:

Relationship Dynamics

| Desire | What It Means | |--------|---------------| | Casual | Looking for no-strings encounters without relationship expectations | | Dating | Open to forming romantic connections that could become relationships | | Friendship | Seeking platonic connections (though on Feeld, this often includes FWB potential) | | Long-term | Interested in building lasting relationships | | Open relationship | Currently in or seeking a relationship where partners can see others | | Polyamory | Interested in multiple simultaneous romantic relationships | | Monogamy | Seeking an exclusive relationship with one partner |

Experience Types

| Desire | What It Means | |--------|---------------| | Threesome | Interested in sexual experiences with three people | | Group play | Open to sexual experiences with more than three people | | Couples | Interested in connecting with couples (as a single) | | Singles | Interested in connecting with individuals (as a couple) | | Watching | Enjoys observing others in intimate situations (voyeurism) | | Being watched | Enjoys being observed during intimate situations (exhibitionism) | | New experiences | Open to trying things outside your normal repertoire |

Power Dynamics

| Desire | What It Means | |--------|---------------| | Dominant | Prefers taking control in intimate situations | | Submissive | Prefers giving up control in intimate situations | | Switch | Enjoys both dominant and submissive roles depending on context | | BDSM | Interested in bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism, masochism | | Kink | Open to non-conventional sexual practices (broader than specific BDSM) |

Connection Styles

| Desire | What It Means | |--------|---------------| | Emotional connection | Prioritizes mental and emotional intimacy | | Physical connection | Prioritizes physical attraction and chemistry | | Intellectual connection | Values mental stimulation and deep conversation | | Slow burn | Prefers building connection over time rather than rushing | | Spontaneous | Open to more immediate, in-the-moment connections |

Specific Interests

| Desire | What It Means | |--------|---------------| | Tantra | Interested in tantric practices—spiritual approaches to sexuality | | Shibari | Interested in Japanese rope bondage as art and/or play | | Ethical porn | Interested in or involved with ethically-produced adult content | | Sex positive | Embraces sexuality as natural and healthy; non-judgmental about preferences | | 420 friendly | Open to cannabis use as part of dating/intimacy |

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How Many Desires Should You Add?

The goldilocks zone: 5-10 Desires

Too few (1-3): Your profile seems incomplete or like you're not sure what you want. The algorithm has less to work with.

Just right (5-10): Shows you've thought about what you want without seeming like you're into absolutely everything.

Too many (15+): Can read as unfocused or like you're just checking boxes. It's harder for people to understand your actual priorities.

Quality Over Quantity

It's better to have 6 accurate Desires than 15 that sort of apply. Select the ones that genuinely describe what you're seeking, not just things you're vaguely okay with.

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Strategic Desire Combinations

Certain Desire combinations signal specific things:

For Couples Seeking Thirds

• Threesome
• Singles
• New experiences
• (Plus specific dynamic preferences)

For Singles Interested in Couples

• Couples
• Threesome
• Group play (if applicable)
• Open relationship

For ENM/Poly People

• Polyamory or Open relationship
• Emotional connection
• Dating or Long-term
• (Avoid sending "just casual" signals unless that's accurate)

For Casual Connections

• Casual
• Physical connection
• Spontaneous
• (Whatever specific interests apply)

For Relationship-Oriented Users

• Dating
• Long-term
• Emotional connection
• Intellectual connection

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Common Desire Mistakes

Mistake 1: Conflicting Signals

Adding both "Monogamy" and "Polyamory" confuses people. Pick the one that actually describes what you're looking for, or if you're genuinely flexible, choose "Open relationship" as a middle ground.

Mistake 2: Over-Selecting Kink Desires

If you add every kink-related Desire (BDSM, Kink, Dominant, Submissive, Switch, Shibari...), it can overwhelm people who might be interested in exploring but aren't deeply in that world. Be selective about which ones are actually priorities.

Mistake 3: Ignoring Connection Style Desires

Many people only select activity-based Desires and skip the connection ones. But "Emotional connection" or "Slow burn" tell people important things about how you want to connect—not just what you want to do.

Mistake 4: Not Updating Over Time

Your Desires might change as you explore. Review them every few months. Something you were curious about might now be a priority—or vice versa.

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How Others See Your Desires

Your Desires appear on your profile below your bio. Users see them as tags they can tap to learn more. Some important points:

They're visible to everyone who can see your profile. There's no way to show some Desires to some people.

Order matters somewhat - Your most prominently displayed Desires tend to get more attention.

Compatibility indicators - Feeld may show when you and another user share Desires, increasing perceived compatibility.

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Desires vs. What's in Your Bio

Your Desires and bio should complement each other, not contradict:

Good combo:

• Desires: Polyamory, Emotional connection, Dating, Long-term
• Bio: "Building my polycule one genuine connection at a time. Looking for people who want more than surface level."

Confusing combo:

• Desires: Casual, Spontaneous, Physical connection
• Bio: "Looking for my forever person. Want something real and deep."

Make sure your Desires back up what you're saying in your profile text. For bio tips, check our Feeld bio examples guide.

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Desire Compatibility and Matching

Feeld uses Desires to influence who sees your profile. While the exact algorithm isn't public, generally:

• Shared Desires increase the chance of being shown to each other
• Directly conflicting Desires (like you want casual, they want long-term only) may reduce visibility
• More Desires = more potential compatibility touchpoints

This is why having well-chosen Desires actually matters for your match rate.

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Private Desires You Should Discuss Instead

Some things are better communicated in conversation rather than listed as public Desires:

• Specific kinks or fetishes beyond the listed options
• Detailed boundaries or limits
• Relationship structure specifics
• Deal-breakers or requirements

Your Desires open the door. Your conversations fill in the details. For help with those conversations, see our guide on consent in dating conversations.

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Using Desires to Filter (Majestic Feature)

If you have Feeld Majestic, you can filter your discover feed by Desires. This helps you find people who share specific interests without endless swiping.

How to use it:

1. Go to Discover settings/filters
2. Find the Desires filter option
3. Select the Desires you want to find
4. Browse the filtered results

This is especially useful for specific interests that might be less common in your area.

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Desire Etiquette

A few social norms around Desires:

Don't assume Desires = immediate consent - Someone listing "Threesome" doesn't mean they want one with you specifically, right now.

Don't interrogate people about their Desires - "I see you have Submissive listed, so..." comes across as objectifying. Let those topics come up naturally.

Do use Desires as conversation starters - "I noticed we both have Intellectual connection listed—what does that look like for you?" is much better.

Do respect when someone's Desires don't match yours - If they're not into what you want, move on gracefully.

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Ready to Connect Based on Shared Desires?

Once you've set up your Desires strategically, the next step is actually connecting with compatible people. Poise helps you write opening messages that acknowledge shared interests without being awkward—turning Desire compatibility into real conversations.

Download Poise and start making meaningful connections.