Name: Poise - AI Dating Coach
Author: Poise

BDSM involves physical intensity that requires knowledge and care. Understanding how bodies work—and how they can be harmed—is essential for enjoying kink safely.

Here's your guide to physical safety in BDSM.

General Physical Safety

Know Your Body

Before play, consider:

Existing injuries or conditions
Medications that affect bleeding or sensation
Flexibility and physical limits
Recent health changes

Partner's Body

Learn about:

Their physical conditions
Injuries or sensitive areas
Medications they take
Any mobility limitations

Environment Setup

Ensure:

Clear space for movement
Soft surfaces for impact/falls
Temperature control
First aid kit accessible

Anatomy Basics

High-Risk Areas

Avoid or be extremely cautious:

Neck (carotid arteries, trachea)
Spine (entire length)
Kidneys (lower back sides)
Joints (knees, elbows, ankles)
Eyes
Ears

Safe Zones for Impact

Relatively safe areas:

Upper back (meaty parts)
Buttocks
Upper thighs (back and sides)
Chest (avoiding breasts carefully)

Danger Zones for Impact

Never strike:

Spine
Kidneys
Tailbone
Joints
Head and neck
Stomach/abdomen

Bondage Safety

Circulation Monitoring

Watch for:

Color changes (blue, white)
Temperature changes (cold)
Numbness or tingling
Swelling

If you notice these:

Release immediately
Restore circulation
Don't rebind until resolved

Nerve Safety

Nerve damage can occur from:

Pressure on nerve clusters
Tight bindings
Prolonged positions
Incorrect placement

High-risk areas:

Wrists (radial nerve)
Inner arm
Behind knee
Armpit area

Position Safety

Body positioning:

Joints shouldn't be hyperextended
Weight shouldn't be on joints
Breathing must not be compromised
Regular position changes if prolonged

Never Leave Alone

Bound people:

Should never be left unattended
Need constant monitoring
May need emergency release
Can't help themselves if needed

Quick Release

Always have:

Safety shears accessible
Way to release quickly
Plan for emergencies
Everything within reach

Impact Play Safety

Warming Up

Always start:

Light and slow
Build intensity gradually
Allow tissue to prepare
Watch responses

Implement Safety

Know your tools:

Different implements have different risks
Thuddy vs. stingy affects tissue differently
Weight and material matter
Practice on pillows first

Marking and Damage

Understand:

What marks are expected
When marking indicates problem
Difference between bruise and injury
When to stop

Aftereffects

After impact:

Area will be sensitive
Bruising may develop later
May need days to heal
Monitor for concerning signs

Breath Play Warning

The Reality

Breath play is:

Among the highest risk activities
Cannot be made completely safe
Has caused deaths even with "safe" practices
Should be approached with extreme caution

If You Choose to Engage

Minimize risk:

Never restrict breathing while bound
Never leave person alone
Know CPR
Be prepared for emergency

Risk Cannot Be Eliminated

Even with precautions:

Fatal outcomes have occurred
Medical emergencies can happen fast
Consent doesn't eliminate risk
Understand what you're accepting

Temperature Play

Cold Play

Safety considerations:

Don't leave ice in one spot
Watch for tissue damage
Some areas more sensitive
Frostbite is possible

Heat Play

Safety considerations:

Test temperature first
Know the materials you're using
Watch for burns
Have cooling ready

Fire Play

Requires:

Specific training
Proper equipment
Safety equipment ready
Experience before attempting

Cutting/Blood Play

High-Risk Activity

Requires knowledge of:

Sanitation and sterilization
Safe cutting zones
First aid for bleeding
Bloodborne pathogen risks

Infection Prevention

Essential:

Sterile equipment
Proper cleaning
No sharing implements
Know STI status

When to Seek Help

Get medical attention for:

Bleeding that won't stop
Signs of infection
Cuts deeper than intended
Any concern

First Aid Essentials

Basic Kit Contents

Keep accessible:

Bandages (various sizes)
Antiseptic wipes
Safety shears
Ice pack
Pain relievers

When to Stop

Stop immediately if:

Numbness or tingling that doesn't resolve
Unexpected bleeding
Difficulty breathing
Severe pain
Loss of consciousness

When to Seek Medical Help

Get professional help for:

Injuries beyond basic first aid
Breathing problems
Severe bleeding
Any head injury
Unresolved numbness

Recovery and Healing

After Intense Play

Physical recovery:

Rest and hydration
Treat any marks appropriately
Watch for delayed symptoms
Gentle movement if stiff

Healing Timeline

Expect:

Soreness for days
Bruises to develop 24-48 hours later
Full healing varies by intensity
Some marks last longer

When Healing Isn't Normal

See a doctor if:

Pain increases significantly
Signs of infection
Marks don't heal as expected
Ongoing numbness or tingling

Building Physical Skills

Education First

Learn through:

Workshops and classes
Mentorship
Books and videos
Practice without intensity

Practice Safely

Build skills by:

Starting with lower risk
Practicing on inanimate objects
Working with experienced partners
Progressing gradually

Ongoing Learning

Continue developing:

Take advanced classes
Learn from mistakes
Stay updated on safety info
Never stop learning

FAQ

How do I know if I've caused damage? Signs include: pain beyond expected, numbness that doesn't resolve, unusual swelling, difficulty moving, or bleeding that won't stop.

Is some pain normal during kink? Intentional pain is part of many kink activities. The key is that it's expected and wanted. Unexpected pain or pain in dangerous areas is a warning sign.

What if something goes wrong? Stop immediately, assess, provide first aid, and seek medical help if needed. Don't delay getting help because you're embarrassed.

Should I tell medical providers what happened? Generally yes. They need accurate information to treat you. Medical providers have seen everything and most are professional.

Related Guides

Safety Is Skill

Physical safety in BDSM isn't about avoiding risk—it's about understanding bodies and minimizing harm while maximizing pleasure. Poise helps you discuss safety considerations with partners before play.